What now?

Good morning!

It has been hard to sit down and blog over the past several days.  Life is in a state of flux.  For so many months it has been about the cancer and treatment but now . . .?  I am going back to work today for the first time since late March.  I am still pretty low energy so I am planning on half days for a while but this is still awesome!  The guys I work for have been incredible and I feel fortunate to be working for them.

As previously mentioned, the doctor said we aren't out of the woods yet so your continued prayers are greatly needed.  We go back to Stanford in 5 weeks for a PET scan to check the rest of my body.  As for today I feel good.  I am eating regular food and can taste it.  For a lot of people who have had the same treatment they have no sense of taste for months.  The one difference is that my taste buds don't work like they used to so food, all food, taste different than before.  For a food addict, like me. it can be a little disappointing but I am grateful I am eating and not drinking my meals!!  It has kept me from just pounding the food - ice cream taste like butter so I don;t even get excited about it anymore.

I am currently reading Changed Into His Likeness by Watchmen Nee.  The thrust of the entire book is that it is God's work not mine that He desires to do in and through me.  My role is to go with Him, if I choose.  He has a plan for each of our lives.  But the plan generally is not the most direct route to the end point.  What is expedient to the Lord may not necessarily to fit my agenda.  Remember Job, sitting there wiped out and suffering and he says to his wife "Shall we indeed accept good from God and not accept adversity?" (Job 2:10)  Who trumps who?  My choice is to put it into the hands of the Giver of Life though admittedly I take it back again and again.  Psalm 103:8 says "The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in mercy."  He is working, let Him!!

Have a great day and Hold Fast

Mike